Coded green.

Monday 15 May 2006

Yellow spring flowers

Pic of the day: These flowers grow by the roadside just a few minutes from where I live in real life.

No long walks

When I look back at my life, there is a string of "last times" that I did not know at the time would be the last. My last kiss, around two decades ago. The last time I played with a girl's hair. The last time I had a best friend, probably. My last hug, likely. My last fat dinner. Thing after thing that just disappeared from my life. I wonder if long walks is one of them now.

Sometime during the weekend it happened. When I tried to take one of my usual walks, I found that I did not walk well. I was limping, and my right foot was pointing partly outward. It did not hurt, or almost not. But if I tried to point the foot forward like the other, it hurt, in my hip and thigh. I can get to the bus, just a little slower than before, but it gets worse the longer I walk, so no hour-long walks now. Perhaps it will just go away, but it won't do so this week. (I know this because I write it at the end of the week.) It will improve, fitfully, but I'm not sure if and when I will be fully restored. Nor do I know why this happened in the first instance.

Walking is basically THE exercise for me. So if I stop that, I am likely to regain my weight much faster than expected. (I'm back up to 85 kg now, only 10 kg (20 pounds) left to my natural weight.) But the thing is, I like walking. Within reason, of course. Often that is when I get my best idea. I write scenes or journal entries in my head, then return to my apartment and type them.

If this lasts more than a couple weeks, I'll probably try to see a doctor. Not that I am convinced they can do much about it: I can't remember them doing anything noteworthy about my health problems in the past, except possibly my childhood asthma... and I really wasn't conscious enough at the time to say for sure whether the pills really worked or whether I just survived long enough for the attacks to fade by themselves. OK, the foreigner who recommended that I use painkiller gel instead of pills was smart, or I was dumb to not find it out by myself. But generally doctors haven't done anything that a priest or shaman could not have done just as well, mostly doling out comforting words and advising me to live a healthy life.


Yesterday <-- This month --> Tomorrow?
One year ago: A mixed bag
Two years ago: Fast forward
Three years ago: Outlandish shop
Four years ago: Trivial pain and joy
Five years ago: Taking myself too seriously?
Six years ago: Just another manic Monday
Seven years ago: Marlboro man

Visit the archive page for the older diaries I've put out to pasture.


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