Freeday 16 July 1999

More news from the leading country in loser research: Norway's two southernmost provinces now have a total of 2515 registered losers. Intriguingly, it turns out that most of the losers live in the rural districts, away from the larger towns. (I had expected the opposite... but then I work in the largest town around here, and can think of several local candidates for losership.)
The province newspaper also discloses that one in four losers has been sexually abused. Again, this is less than I would have expected, and probably reflects a larger number of male losers than females. While males are also abused, especially in childhood, they are less likely to experience this than girls and (above all) less likely to report it.

I wonder how it must feel be be a genuine, card-carrying loser. I mean, in my years of playing, a game is not lost until it is over. And to the best of my knowledge, none of these people are wandering around dead. But perhaps it feels like they are. I've heard some people describe that feeling, but I find it hard to imagine. I tend to agree with the scripture that says: "A living dog is better than a dead lion." Or to quote a more recent and secular proverb: "It ain't over till the fat lady sings."

Of course, the spirit of perseverance can have some side effects too. Like the 54 year old guy in the news today, who was stopped by the police for driving drunk. He waited till the police officers were out of sight, then started driving again. A bit further along the road, there was the police, promptly stopping him again. They left him without a driver's license, but this did not deter the man. Sadly for him, the police had put up a new control post further along the same road, and this time they took his car keys. Now, you would believe the game was over. But not so. The man started to push his car. Sadly for him, the steering wheel was locked. And so the trip finally ended, outside the road on the other side of the highway.

Oh, and re my highly informal review of :::heavy sigh::: yesterday: I don't mean that "high soap content" is a bad thing for a diary. After all, an estimated half a whopping billion people watch "soap opera" type TV series. It may be more now. That's so many people that if they were lined up to shake your hand, you wouldn't get anywhere near the end of the queue if you live till you're a hundred. Scientists have speculated that we are pre-programmed to be attracted to this kind of entertainment, as well as to rumors (preferably sleazy rumors). The idea is that humans are social creatures, even more so than our genetic cousins the great apes. For all of our species' history we have depended on the pack / tribe / community in order to survive. Under these circumstances, it becomes a vital skill to keep up with who is loving whom and hating whom, who is sleeping together and why not, and all the other myriad of relationships between a group of people. The ones who kept all these things in their heads could survive and breed, while the nerds would have to run around inventing fire or something to get time of day at all.

Or resign to a life as certified losers.