Tuesday 16 March 2004

Pic of the day: Words not spoken may be as important as those spoken. And so on. (Photo from anime Daa! Daa! Daa!.)

Unnoticed choices

In political debate, I sometimes hear people say that "homosexual lifestyle is a choice". Which I am pretty sure must be the plain truth. But not a very deep truth. I can do much better. Watch: "Heterosexual lifestyle is a choice."

So, perhaps you've been straight since you were born. That certainly doesn't mean that you have to make love at all. You could decide to go read a book instead. Take a cold shower or whatever. Well, it's probably a bit late for that on your wedding night, if any. But you've walked a long path already. And you could have stopped at any time. You could have gone elsewhere. You could have become a monk or nun, or something equivalent. A lone wolf perhaps. You did not need to do what you wanted to do. True, why shouldn't you? But there was always a choice, and others have chosen differently. It does not matter here whether they choose better or you. That is not the topic. The topic is that you had a choice, but did you notice it?

In Europe in the Middle ages, there was only one religion. Did people have a choice? You bet. They did not have a choice to become Buddhists or Shintoists or Wiccans, but they still had a choice. Even if they were told only one thing as an absolute truth, they had a choice. Some people chose differently (and were burned at a stake). Most did not even notice.

***

It is the same today. Oh, we have a lot more choices presented to us. But most people still sail through, not stopping to think, not looking around. They believe without hesitation that having more and more stuff will make them happy. Perhaps they make a choice between Pepsi and Coke. But the many deeper choices pass them by. You do not need to keep up with the neighbors. You don't need to impress the girls or the boys. You don't need to be pretty or sporty or fashionable. No one is stopping you. For some it is easy, for some it is hard, for some it seems impossible. But it is there. The choice. It is yours, and whether you notice the path you take or not: Wherever you go, there you are.

I am a man, but that does not define me. I am white, but that does not define me. I am Norwegian, but that does not define me. I am attracted to women, but that does not define me. I have a job, but it does not define me. I consider myself a Christian, but in truth even that does not define me. I am defined by the choices I actually make. And the choices I fail to make until it is too late. Wherever I go, there I am. Whatever I choose, that's who I am.