Sunday 16 January 2000

Pic of the day: "In reality, I must confess, I am not a knight..."
(Screenshot from Daggerfall.)

Woke up early, played a little Daggerfall and wrote on my latest romance novel, got very tired after a couple hours and crashed to bed again. Dreamt that I had a very small apartment in the outskirts of some nameless city in southern Germany. I still had my place up here in Norway, only renting this thing for a couple of years.

Oooh. Nice try, subconscious. Reaallly subtle. You know, there's a reason why I am conscious and you are ... sub.

Writing romance novels is not nearly as easy as it looks. Then again, it looks ridiculously easy. I made scattered attempts today again, but without much luck. Instead I spent much of the day riding around in Daggerfall pretending to be a tall, handsome knight. In reality, I must confess, I am not a knight.

I just wrote about romance to a person who has been nice enough to e-mail me. I guess I can share it with you lazybums who don't, what with me being so generous (and lacking stuff for a good entry, after having played the day away). OK, here goes:

I don't believe that God has created humans in pairs and then scattered them around, leaving them to search and finally find their soul twin or ideal partner, The One. I can't guarantee that it never happens, like any other miracle, but it's hardly the rule. It does make for good romance novels, though.

In reality, I think some people are The One (the ideal partner) for a whole lot of folks. And some just for a few. And some are just a nuisance for whoever may be desperate enough to try to live with them. Yes, there are some who just fit better together than others. In general, it makes sense to pair off the most beautiful with the most beautiful ... makes for less temptation to cheat. And in the same way downward to the most ugly. Then again, not all agree on what is beautiful and what is ugly. There are certain standards in each society, and some global. (Generally, the more symmetric you are, the more attractive.) But things such as color and size are subject to personal tastes. Some want them yellow and some want them black, some want them thin and some want them thick. But most want them playful and loyal. (Which is why, when all else fails, they end up with a puppy or a kitten.)

While there are limits to what we can do about our body symmetry, there are things to do with our attitude. You people who are dating or already married may want to check out the January 2000 issue of Psychology Today or at least their web site. There are some new data on marriages and why they fail, or not. It makes sense, too. (As if I would know.)

Yes, one of my favorite magazines has finally made it to the web. I have updated my "compound of interests" web page accordingly. On the down side, one of my favorte MUDs (the Weave) seems to have disappeared during my extended absence. The Internet is an unstable place, where connections open and close, grow and fade, their hyperlinks like synapses in a giant brain.

If you are not familiar with MUDs, these are online multiplayer games. Traditionally text-based, they are somewhat like a cross between a computer game and a chat channel. Both girls and boys play on these, though probably slightly less girls than the playing characters may indicate. The focus of these sites are roleplaying, and you can not expect any relationships formed there to necessarily carry over into the real world.

I wish I could say that it is different for IRC (Internet Relay Chat). But it isn't always. Some people are very different online compared to in the flesh. I almost said "compared to in real life". But I am not so sure anymore which personality is more real. I suspect that many people truly wish they could be different, but fear makes them hold back. In a new environment where there is less chance of a backlash, they may allow themselves more freedom. (Not that this is much comfort for those who meet Prince Charming on the Net and end up on the airport meeting the toad.)

OK, that was today's "relationships" column. Now to go online on IRC ... ;)