If I were to eat a pastry all at once (or over the course of six hours or less) I would get horribly sick the next day. I would probably survive, but I am not entirely sure. I have not tried that much fat since the purgatory weeks in 2005 when I found out I no longer tolerated fat. So I eat one pastry over three days for breakfast, when I have had no other fat for a long time.

Sugar, though… sugar is my friend. I love sugar, and sugar loves me! Candy, sweets, desserts (without cream), sugar-filled chocolates, sugar-laden beverages… I can snack on these all through the workday. I automatically stop when I feel sweet enough, usually, but a while later I start again. Evidently my body mops up sugar from the bloodstream at a ferocious rate when there is too much of it: I used a blood sugar tester for diabetics for a while to observe my own blood sugar, since both my parents had diabetes and at least one grandparent as well. However, after a while I stopped. My body does not seem to care how much carbs I throw at it. After a while it is back to the baseline it has in the morning. Conversely, I can go all day without falling below that level, if I for some reason cannot eat. It is like a mutant power, even my doctor was baffled that it did not seem to matter much whether I had eaten or fasted before a test. So, I seem to be the Chosen One of the Sugar, or something. Or perhaps it is paying reparations for my parents?

And of course, you don’t actually get fat from sugar. Not a typo, I mean you and not only me. Humans suck monumentally at converting table sugar to fat, though we can slowly transform fructose into fat in the liver. What we do is burn the sugar instead of fat, and store the fat in more or less sexy places depending on our hormones. Evidently there is some destruction of fat though, even for me, because despite my partial pastries and nightly noodles, my weight remains constant (after shrinking for some months after I moved).

I must admit, fat really satisfies in a way sugar can not. Sugar is temporary, but fat is until death do you part. Well, that is often the case at least. I have read that most people put on a pound each Christmas season and never takes it back off until their final illness, if any. But I don’t celebrate Christmas anymore. And if I did, it would be with my sugar. ^_^