Thursday 7 April 2005

Pic of the day: Alas, feasts of gargantuan proportions are not without their dangers. Although I think I was more moderate than this screenshot from the anime The World of Narue.

Doctor visit again

(Copied from my LiveJournal, because for a change I actually wrote the whole thing down there.)

***

I've lost weight over these 3 weeks of eating watered juice and yogurt. But lately I have felt normal again, so I decided to start eating a bit more. Yesterday I ate more yogurt than in a long time, staying full at all times. Whenever I did not feel stuffed, I would eat a little more yogurt, or a few bites of fluffy chocolate, or working my way down a bag of fluffy cheese snacks. This morning, I woke up and soon became hungry, so I did it again.

As I was about to go to work, I started to feel weak. Not quite fainting, but partially losing pressure, that's how it feels. This is never a good sign, and so I waited. True enough, a bit later my guts started running wild. I can live with that. But then I started to shake with frost even though the living room was warmer than necessary (2 centigrades above recommended temperature, actually). This is a certified bad thing, and also a signature symptom from 3 weeks ago when this first started. The queasiness was absent, but there was a very mild chest pain which I assume comes from the stomach.

"Oh God oh God please help me please please" prayed I. "Why don't you call a doctor??" said God, or words to that effect. Now, if you've read the people who think they know more about God than the rest of us, that's not what God is supposed to say. God is supposed to feel touched by our trust in him alone (I wouldn't say flattered, I think his self- image isn't low enough to require flattery) and then twink the lowbie accordingly. So I was like "Huh?" and God was like "It's been 3 weeks already! What does it take to make you call a doctor?" Well, I suppose it was God. It certainly seems like the same small voice in my heart that tells me to not lie stroking myself after I wake up in the morning even though I don't have anyone else to stroke. I doubt the devil would say that. Anyway! I called the doctor's office and there was a trainee who could take a look at me either tomorrow or today. When I hesitated, the office nurse slotted me in today. I was now very tired after the freezing, but set my pocket PC to beep in time to reach the bus.

I did not hear the pocket PC, at least not consciously, but woke up at the same time anyway. Off to town I went. As always there was plenty of people in the waiting room, but after perhaps a quarter of an hour I got called over the intercom. The trainee was a guy who looked like a teenager from Rogaland. He cannot possibly have been a teenager and I'm not sure he is from Rogaland either, but that's how he looked. Also his name was Neerland. (Rogaland is a province in south-western Norway.) He bade me sit down and explain my problems. I was just finished going through my diarrhea in great detail when the assistant nurse came in and switched off the intercom he had used to call me up from the waiting room. He made me take off most but not all of my clothes and checked from my chest down to below the belt a bit. For some reason it didn't tickle. Almost always when people touch me, it tickles very uncomfortably. He also asked some supplementing questions.

His theory is much the same as mine: The virus infection in my respiratory tract probably also hit the digestive tract, causing the first week of diarrhea and queasiness. Since then, my digestion has simply gotten used to not eating, and I started off in the wrong way. I should avoid faturated snacks like chocolate and grilled stuff and rather eat crackers. Yogurt is good though. And I should take moderate quantities of anti-acid drugs preemptively, even if I don't feel any acid reflux, that's his idea.

If there is no improvement within 2 weeks, I should call again.

***

Actually God also told me in advance to avoid the chocolate, but the chokolate told me to eat it, so I made an executive decision and ate it in moderation. I suppose the chocolate is presently outvoted and will have to stay in the cupboard until it is old and dry.

Oh yeah, and the fellow also asked me whether I had had a digital rectal examination. Yes I had, about two years ago. He dropped the topic with that, perhaps because of my horrified expression. Since you can't see my horrified expression (except in the user icon), let me just say if that was the digital examination, I would rather not experience the analog. If I were gay, I'd stick to cuddling, thank you very much. Actually I'd like some cuddling even if I am straight, but that is beyond the scope of this treatise.