Tuesday 17 April 2001

Pic of the day: It may soon be time to whip out the credit cards again!

Scary synchronicities

Today, I bought myself a new pair of trousers. I don't usually do that anymore; indeed, many moons have passed since I have done anything like it. But by now I felt secure in the knowledge that I would not need that money to buy clothes for SuperWoman or Cutie, as SuperWoman leaves by the end of the month and Cutie is too shy to invite me on her own. She is not the extremely outgoing type, and besides she does not know me as well as SW does.

There was also the point that my current trousers would pretty much fall down around my knees if not held up by a belt - indeed, I have had to get new holes in the belt. I am not sure how long this will last, but it has lasted for half a year and if anything it seems more pronounced now than in the winter. So I told my conscience that I might have 1 pair of trousers that actually fit me. Just one. Consciences may be hard to convince, but they are reasonably easy to shout down. So I bought the trousers ... but I did not get them with me home, because they were too short and the shop had to fix that first.

It almost goes without saying that this evening, Superwoman called and asked me to stay with them this coming weekend.

***

I have told a long time ago that I rarely have Deja Vu anymore. You know, the feeling that you have experienced exactly this moment before. Usually you cannot remember where or when, only that it was exactly the same. Well, yesterday I experienced it again, and it was scary.

I have seen several references to the "Lensman" series of science fiction books. It is actually quite old for SF, hailing from the middle of the 20th century. I have heard that it has been an inspiration for much of the science fiction that came after it. I would definitely think it has been an inspiration for the Green Lantern concept as I remember it from my childhood, too: The Lensmen each had a personal "lens" that magnified their psionic powers, and were selected for their blameless personality.

However, I have never actually read the Lensman series. I know it mainly from passing references, not least the GURPS adaptation for those who want to roleplay in the Lensman universe. This has been quite popular, I understand. Yesterday was the first time I actually read an excerpt from any of the books. There is a free sample chapter. And as I read the very first speech of the All-Highest of the evil Eddorians, I suddenly had the Deja Vu. I knew that I had read this particular passage word for word somewhere, but I did not remember where or when or in what context. Somehow it resonated very powerfully. I stopped reading, suddenly terrified by the portent. That this was some moment where my fate hung in balance, where something decisive was about to happen. I said a very short prayer. And when I looked back at the text, it was completely unfamiliar to me. I knew that I had never seen it before in my life, and I could not see what was so special about it:

'I must now decide whether to make this space our permanent headquarters or to search farther,' the All-Highest radiated harshly to his Council. 'On the one hand, it will take some time for even those planets which have already formed to cool. Still more will be required for life to develop sufficiently to form a part of the empire which we have planned or to occupy our abilities to any great degree. On the other, we have already spent millions of years in surveying hundreds of millions of continua, without having found anywhere such a profusion of planets as will, in all probability, soon fill both of these galaxies. There may also be certain advantages inherent in the fact that these planets are not yet populated. As life develops, we can mould it as we please. Krongenes, what are your findings in regard to the planetary possibilities of other spaces?'

***

I am not insane. Deja Vu is a quite common thing, most people experience it sometimes. The most reasonable theory I have seen is that it is like a "net split" in the brain, where the experience arrives at the consciousness from two different paths. One of the paths is delayed; and when the consciousness gets this information, it already has it from another channel, now in the short term memory. I suppose that for this to be effective, the main channel must be the delayed one, while a lower priority channel has deposited the information in memory shortly before.

In the past, I was not scared of Deja Vu. In fact, I would sometimes make my own, when I was in the righ mood. I would listen to the radio news in a relaxed mood, and just cruise on the voice. After a while, I could often know the next couple of words before I heard them. If I tried to actively guess, it crumbled, but as long as I just surfed on the soundstream in a relaxed mood, it worked. This really works well with the theory mentioned above.

But lately, I have had very few Deja Vues. And I find them creepy. (This started before I saw The Matrix, by the way.) I don't like things that are outside my control. I don't like uncontrolled things happening to my brain. I want the world to stay within its rules. But sometimes, it follows its own rules, not my logic.