Thursday 19 August 1999

Grain fields
Pic of the day: The world as seen through a train window in Eastern Norway. Sorry but the picture is totally off topic. (Though the urban population around here may think otherwise.) I just liked it.
...

I guess yesterday's theme emotion was loneliness of a sorts ... the need to reach out, the need to be in touch, the need to belong. Though it is not the full-blown lonelieness that the self-proclaimed chick told of, the one that feels like someone is keeping part of you away. Man, that must hurt.

Anyway, mortal emotion of the day seems to be greed. Though the day is still very young as I eat my whopper cheese at Oslo Central, and I will certainly look out for more emotions if I can remember to. This might be fun.

Anyway, here I was dragging my luggage through the station. (Not all of us have a Luggage with small feet, running in our wake.) There is a hall full of luggage boxes, where I can store my preciousss stuff while I shop, eat and stare slackjawed at the big city. I made sure I had lots of small coin, and then proceeded to store my luggage (minus the PC of course) in a box for kr 15. I put on a kr 10 coin (worth ca $1.25) and followed up with kr 1 coins, which it promptly spat out. It did not accept anything less than kr 5. While I had all other coins, I did not have a 5er. So I had to supply another kr 10.
If I ever find a change to steal back from them, I will.

I guess greed is one of those emotions that only exists in other people. I certainly cannot see any in myself. I just want my right, and barely even that. A good bet is that this is how others feel too. How many times have you though "Oh, I am greedy, and it feels good!" ? (I mean literally, not in bed or anything.) In my previous line of work, I had the pleasure of listening to old people moaning about their upcoming starvation. People who had more money than me, or any of my friends, in fact more than we can reasonably hope to ever have.

I tentatively conclude that greed does not feel good. That greed is insecurity. And because this insecurity is so deep in us, greed does not really help. You always need more.

This is not much comfort for the thousands who died in Turkey this week as shoddy constructions tumbled in the first major earthquake. Turks are outraged at the builders who flouted safety regulations in their new high-rise buildings. And why did they do that? Hardly out of a desire to see their work in rubble and tenants crushed in the ruins. Rather it is our old acquaintance the greed again. And it may not be convenient for Turkish media to mention, but it is a good bet that not all of the savings went straight into the deep pockets of the builders. The demand for cheap housing may have been just as important. For when it comes down to it, we all want the most for the least.

...

My whopper cheese consumed, I am now waiting for the train to take me to IBM's training center. We are expected to work till 20 in the evening before going back to Oslo and checking in at the hotel. And if things are anything like normal, I'm not going to get paid a cent for working double day. When I've broached this before, I've been told rather flat out that I'm so lucky to be allowed to live on a hotel and get $50 a day to cover my expenses. Yeah, right. As if I would rather sleep anywhere else than in my own bed, or rather eat in a strange city than back home where I know my way.
As if I would bother with this at all if anyone else were qualified. I have spent years and quite a bit of my money to become who and what I am. And I intend to take back what is mine.

One man's greed is another man's justice.

Come to think of it, it's not like I'm working my gluteus maximus off at work normally. I think of myself as a resource person, and I've spent quite a bit of time and money to have those resources. (Of course, it also helps to be born with the storage space for them, but I cannot credibly claim the honor for that.) Now, I usually lead a fairly relaxed work life compared to my coworkers, though a necessary one. I am sort of like a priest of those ancient days, where life was governed by forces beyond mortal ken. I perform my incomprehensible rites on regular dates and some extra in bad times. Supposedly without me, catastrophes would break loose and our little society would end in ruins. I also teach people the right way to approach the non-human entities that rule their lives, the computers.

And for this, of course, I demand a small monetary compensation, as is good and proper...


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